It’s been really bloody hot

In which Hari waffles about being hot and how terrible it is

Reader, I’m sure your feed has been plastered with wall-to-wall posts about climate change and what recent weather means for the future, and all of that. You know it already. I’m not a climate scientist; I’m a social scientist, and I’m not going to tell you anything you aren’t already aware of. Instead of that, I’m going to complain about how I can’t do the 1000 hours challenge in the season it was best designed for, and talk about the chaos that ensues when it gets hot.

I have always been perplexed by the notion that civil uprisings are more likely to occur in the summer. Why would you do that at the worst time of the year to be outside? When I’ve asked people who haven’t studied it why they think this is, they cite that people don’t like to go out in the rain, it’s easier to get people together in good weather, etc. Studies suggest, however, that the real reason is basically because abnormal heat makes you into a different person in many ways. An article from BBC Future points out that a 2017 study found that serotonin levels correlated to ambient temperature. Now, I’m (nearly) a mental health scientist – I don’t believe that serotonin is a ‘happy hormone’, it’s just not that simple – but what I do know is that it is implicated in multiple forms of psychopathology. The heat, as the kids said in 2013, maybe makes you cray cray.

The same BBC Future article states that some believe testosterone increases during the summer months. They cite an increase in domestic violence; I thought this was a flimsy connection and that there may be other reasons for that, so I went and had a look at some studies myself. A 2021 study of 8,367 middle-aged men by Jun Ho Lee and Sung Won Lee found that testosterone tends to peak in January, and findings suggest that there’s actually a negative relationship between daylight hours, ambient temperature and testosterone levels. In other words, they found that more light and sun gives you less testosterone. So, if you’re not getting your gains in, it’s because the summer turns you into a floppy soy boy, or whatever the kids say now.

As an aside, there are a lot of studies about seasonal testosterone levels in goats. So. Do with that information what you will.

There are obviously many other things at play here: it could be that injustices that require mass protest are more likely to occur in the summer, because lawmakers and enforcers are also affected by the heat in weird ways. Would Palestine Action have been proscribed if it was November? It’s not possible to say, but it is probable that people have more resources available to make less reactive, more considered decisions in cooler weather. Similarly, are American police officers more likely to kill someone in the summer months? The data on this is (unsurprisingly) not easy to get, but as the heat rises, it’s not just civilians who are likely to be impacted by all this.

Why am I saying all of this? Because, let me tell you, tensions are high at the allotment ar hyn o bryd. People are complaining. People are bickering. When is that fence going to be fixed, or just fucking torn down? When are you going to weed then? When was the last time you saw him, I haven’t seen him for a fortnight? It is endless. What do you do when you can’t tend your own plot because it’s too hot? You complain about other people’s plots. What do you do when you hear someone’s been complaining about your plot? You complain about them. What do you do when someone complains about you? You complain about them back. And it goes on and on – this person’s a bully, this person’s a sexist, this person’s a fascist. I have never seen such pettiness in all my life. When I was campaigning for rabbit rights last September, no one cared. If I did it last week? There would have been a coup. I would have been skinned and put on a pyre, and they probably would have put the rabbits up there with me.

To be frank, though, this is probably the ideal time for the rabbits, because no one is on their plots, and neither am I. It’s too hot to go outside. It’s too hot to do anything.

To no one’s surprise, I forgot to track my 1000 hours challenge. I reckon I’m doing quite well. Probably like at least 400 hours. I don’t know, that might be grossly over or under. The thing is I’m still giving it a go, and that’s what counts. Summer is where most people make up a lot of their 1000 hours challenge time, because the weather is nice and it’s easy to get out and the kids aren’t in school. I simply cannot step outside the door without feeling like I’m going to die. How am I supposed to pretend I did better than last year (while having no idea) if I can’t go outside?

I’ll be honest, the weather puts me in a foul mood. Tom and I went to Mostly Jazz, Funk and Soul Festival on Saturday and I couldn’t even enjoy Craig Charles’ DJ set because I was too hot to dance or enjoy the novelty of the greatest sit-com star and Robot Wars host of all time doing yet another banging set. I’m just not built to be hot. I’ve heard that the UK heat is worse than heat in some other countries, even when the temperature is lower, because we are an island and so the air is more humid. Apparently, that makes it harder for us to cool off by sweating. I don’t know. I just don’t like it.

It rained today. Maybe it will rain again tomorrow. We can only hope.